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There is only one you!


“You can’t be everything to everyone…”

I’ve told myself this a million times but for some reason it has now clicked. Summer 2019 there was a revelation and To’Ccorra realized she had to put her needs, her sanity, her health at the forefront. I’m that person who supports everyone. No, like really, EVERYONE!!! I didn’t care who didn’t come to my events or support my endeavors because I was blessed regardless. I make it a point to not base my actions on the actions of others. And that probably played a role in me spreading myself so thinly. I promised I’d listen to my body more this year and while I thought I was doing great, it wasn’t until I pushed myself so far and was at an event just struggling to not hit the floor that I knew things had to change. It was a repeat of me working through my blood clots. Thinking one more day won’t hurt when in actuality it could kill me.

My friends were constantly telling me to rest so they were pleased! I disconnected for a few days and just slept. Of course I would have loved to done so longer but I’m a blogger, I had to return to social media even if just for a quick post. While at Planchella this past weekend, Tina of Her Life Sparkles, suggested some great post scheduling apps so those will be getting used very soon.

I use to hide behind being an influencer as the reason I couldn’t stop moving. Having a chronic illness is lonely, I say it a lot. So on my good days I’m out!! But 30 minutes in the sun can easily turn into a 4 hour ER visit for someone with lupus. I’ve been turning down events a lot over the last couple of weeks and somehow the ball is still rolling. I’m scheduling things far apart. Meetings that can be calls are scheduled as just that. I’m cutting costs everywhere I can which is always a stress reliever. Also at Planchella was Elisha McGhee, reason I decided to do this blog post. Elisha spoke on not being able to be everywhere at everything for everyone and being ok with that, which was my biggest hurdle. I had never heard it outside my head, if that makes sense. And I was with Nurse Bestie so that didn’t help at all!

Get away from the guilt. That’s the hardest part. Hell, I may be the only one who had it. I love that people can depend on me but I also know it’s one thing one of my close friends hates! Because if she asks me to do something, I can be hooked up to a morphine drip…if it can be done on my iPhone it’s getting done. HORRIBLE, I know. Don’t be like me. You come first, in all areas. What are some ways you put yourself first? Put your answers in the comments. Until next time loves, Curls n’ Cocktails

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