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....They loved who they thought you were.

Who else spent the last 2 nights glued to the television watching The Bobby Brown Story? Before I even get into what I'm here for can we acknowledge how damn well Wood McClain acted his ass off as Bobby. They didn't accept his submission for an Emmy nomination for The New Edition Story but let's cross our fingers. Gabrielle Dennis was amazing as Nippy as well, I wasn't sure who I prefer between her and YaYa as Whitney, but Part Two got me. This isn't a review of the biopic. I know there are countless reviews online right now and after live tweeting back-to-back I wasn't in the mood. It was great, not as great as the NE story but still some damn good television and had me regretting I hadn't read the book.

I want to talk about the relationship between Bobby and Whitney and how it mirrors so many relationships around us or the relationships we're in. Whitney was America's princess and ate it up. Bobby was the bad boy on his was to being known as the king of R&B. No matter what good Bobby did professionally his personal downfalls would always stand out because they started so early and damn it he was a black boy from the hood....a nigga from the projects, if we wanna be real(because in the eyes of some of "them" no amount of money can change that), and the media loveed it, kept them busy, gave them stories. While Whitney remained to appear the perfect angel. That's the narrative they chose to live. No matter how it effective those around them or how it unknowingly would effect them in the long run. Bobby was gonna protect his Nippy and let the world say what they wanted and she was gonna do the same for him.

Why do we do that? Why do we allow for toxic relationships/friendships/associations to progress knowing they are detrimental? Whitney asked Bobby to get clean and then picked him up from jail with a vial of coke!! So that's what went down after she ran to him?!?! I know that's wealthy folks activity but think about those times when you were done with alcohol and that person poured you a drink, or sat next to you with some Chipotle instead of suggesting taking a walk knowing the doc said you are at risk for diabetes, let's not forget sus knowing you working on your anger but picking at you just to get a reaction as you stared at the last hole you punched in the wall, or when he/she chose not to be at your side during a spiritual journey, basically anytime that person was thinking as an "I" and not an "us".

"They loved who they thought you were." That stood out to me because we have all been there. It may not have been America we were talking about but "they" loved what they thought the person was 24/7/365. When you have a mate who is loved by EVERYONE it makes leaving hard. Not only because you have to face all these people and all the questions but because you go through periods of "well shit, is it me?" Even if you are the issue, and by "issue" I mean the person who causes they negative behavior, then yes, that is still reason to get up and walk out. No one is the same person at all times. Just is what it is. A great person, does not guarantee a great partner. A great father/mother doesn't always make a great husband/wife.

A person can only try for so long. Jussie Smollett has a song and the lyrics go "Well if I don't make you smile anymore, why can't you just walk out the door? Why you makin' it harder that it has to be?" That makes so much sense. You could take a shower tonight, slip and die and then what? (Capricorns are so dramatic) Instead of finding happiness you stayed somewhere and tolerated less than probably both of you deserved. Searching for happiness is healing and there is never anything wrong with that.

Until later loves,

Curls n' Cocktails

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